I don't know about you, but, every once in a while I fin myself wishing and praying for something to change in my life. It could be as simple as praying the pain goes away when I stub my toe or it could e a big moment like when you find out a loved one is ill or the company is going to be laying you off. What I hope for along with the erasing of the difficulty is a moment of profound meaning like the apostles got when they saw Jesus transfigured. I sometimes get discouraged that these moments don't occur so often and that from time to time I feel as though "Jesus is NOT my copilot". Like most, I guess, discouragement can happen most intensely when I feel like I am alone. It's not that Jesus leaves my side or that He is not listening to my prayers, it's just that when moments of profound faith, grace and love envelop me, I sometimes wonder why that feeling couldn't have happened when I "REALLY NEEDED IT" I mean, it is so much easier to live in the way I know I have been called to I seem to be catching every break. When I think about it, I don't really question my faith or my intentions, I just felt like I need something to embrace me and help me, even if just for a few minutes to relieve me of something (and to be honest, I don't even know what it was that I needed relieved).
For a time, I felt almost guilty of having this unrealistic expectation that God was just going to infuse me with some sort of special grace. Maybe I was asking God for too much in needing the profound moment, maybe God was busy carrying the cross of someone whose burden is much greater than mine. Who was I to want something more, something special? And then I heard the word...HOPE. In that moment I did not receive a special grace, what I did realize in that moment is that just like we ask for profound moments from God, God also gives us the opportunity to be profound in our faith. He allows us to tap into our hope and when we do this, I'd like to think that we give God a profound moment. We show him that whether we are the center of attention, deeply faith filled, or questioning everything, we still follow.
Peter was right. If I were him I'd want to build a tent and live in that profound moment forever. Why? Because faith and even life is easy when we are surrounded by the profound grace and wisdom of God. Something interesting happened then. The words I needed were given to someone else. These were the words. "If our hope is centered in God's Love and if our hope is centered in the Resurrection than our hope must also be centered on the cross."
So my friends, I have come to this conclusion. Our hope, our life, our love and our faith can only be made profound if we truly embrace those times we feel alone, just like Jesus must have when He carried His cross. When we seek a moment of grace and don't feel like we have it within us, it is then that we truly surrender ourselves to God and it is in that surrender that we find that profound moment. I was empty. I felt alone. And then at the cross I found Him. But you know what, I think He was there all along. That's pretty profound.
MUSIC FOR THE 2ND SUNDAY OF LENT